“Many adults are put off when youngsters pose scientific questions. Children ask why the sun is yellow, or what a dream is, or how deep you can dig a hole, or when is the world’s birthday, or why we have toes. Too many teachers and parents answer with irritation or ridicule, or quickly move on to something else. Why adults should pretend to omniscience before a five-year-old, I can’t for the life of me understand. What’s wrong with admitting that you don’t know? Children soon recognize that somehow this kind of question annoys many adults. A few more experiences like this, and another child has been lost to science. There are many better responses. If we have an idea of the answer, we could try to explain. If we don’t, we could go to the encyclopedia or the library. Or we might say to the child: “I don’t know the answer. Maybe no one knows. Maybe when you grow up, you’ll be the first to find out.”—Carl Sagan (via milktea-r)
It was before starting high school. My family took a trip to Hawaii and one of those days my brother and I walked along the road to the beach. He went surfing while I swam and explored. I watched him surf for a while in a tree. There was something about the warm sun, the calm wind, and the tingly, tranquil feeling that put me to sleep. I fell asleep in a tree. Probably because I had no worries or anxieties like I do these days. I can’t even sleep without medication. I would give up a lot to go back to the care-free days of innocence and not have to worry about my health or bills, etc. Funny how time flies…
I’m starting to value the lessons and trials God has been introducing me. In the moment, it’s easy to blame everyone and give in. But nights like these, I have time to take a step back and optimisically think things through.
To simply put it, I’m better off alone. Well for now at least. Being a person’s significant other failed terribly, dating is disappointing, putting too much faith in friendship just gave me more anger and hoping for support from family was obviously too much to ask. Therefore, after running in repetitive circles around people who are unavailable…in the end I find myself alone.
Maybe this is where God wants me - to be on my own and putting all my energy into myself and my relationship with Him. What could I offer to anyone else? I’m so jaded and broken. Am I lonely? Not really. I kind of like the peacefulness. I need to meditate and get rid of my anger and resentment. I know I deserve a guy who will respect and cherish me, yet I keep repeating old habits. Alone could be a very good thing for myself. When things feel desperate, look at it objectively because that might be where God wants you.